i wanted to come on here and squeeee with delight that the phillies took a 2-1 lead in the series tonight. however, that sadly isn't the case. but that's why they play 7 games. so since i'm still slightly bitter over their loss, i'm moving right along...
my nibbles last night for dinner were kind of boring, but delish nonetheless.
i had a major hankering for spaghettios. does that ever happen to you? i maybe eat spaghettios twice a year. we maybe have spaghettios in our cabinets twice a year. but since my little nugget of a sister came home from school over the weekend, mama and papa notsoordinary stoked the shelves. since she forgot the remaining cans at home-i helped myself.
this looked and smelled so good. sadly, after just a few bites i was over it. the appeal didn't last long at all.
luckily i started off with a big plate of leafy greens. surprisingly this held me over and kept me feeling full and content. um, and ohhh. you see that bottle of dressing right there? lets just say i may have fallen in love. i'd marry that salad dressing if the state of PA would allow me to do so.
i'm way too lazy to upload any pictures currently. seeing as i'm snuggled under my heating blanket at this very moment. heating blankets may just be one of the best inventions ever made. i'd probably marry that, too. what can i say, i'm a hussy. {i kid, i kid!}
something i don't kid about? getting my round booty into shape. i have fallen off the wagon completely. i don't know what my deal has been but i can't seem to motivate myself to get to the gym, to stay on a healthy eating track. in the words of snookie,
"whaaaaaaa!" i like to blame my lack of motivation on my lack of being able to find a job. of being stuck in such a rut.
{excuses, excuses...when and how did i turn into this girl??} a patient and i had a friendly conversation the other day. and by friendly, i really mean she was a complete
beeotch that caused steam to shoot out of my ears. anyway, we were chatting about how i want to be back in new york. how i want to be working in the world of communications-
writing,
talking,
commuting,
twittering,
networking and to simply be in the middle of all the hustle and bustle that is...the big apple. {i so desperately want to take a chuck out of the apple!}
the patient starts telling me i don't want it bad enough.
that something is missing. i'm not doing everything i could possibly be doing. if i wanted it bad enough i would achieve it and get the job. mmmmm? excuse me? i told her i do want it BAD. i told her i am doing EVERYTHING i possibly can. she got snippy. she said i was wrong. that i'm just telling myself that but really sitting back and letting things fly out the window. she said that until i get my act together and start doing things right-i'm not going to get the job.
how dare her! the convo went on like this a few more minutes before my co-worker saved me. when she left, i gasped for fresh air. i felt like someone tore me a new one. i also began to doubt myself. i NEVER doubt myself. if one thing is certain in my life-it's my confidence. even after one too many failed interviews,
{not enough experience, too much experience, we went a different direction...} i still hold my head up very high. but this woman, within a ten minute talk, completely crushed me. granted, i was semi over it in 20 minutes. but clearly if i'm mentioning it right now, i'm still feeling bitter. only natural, right?
now, after that mouthful, i'm taking my crabby 'tude to bed. if only that patient knew every shooting star, every bedtime prayer, penny thrown into a fountain, 11:11 wish goes to finding a job.
THAT job. the one that will make every failed attempt with any other company oh so worth it.
until then...goodnight and fingers crossed.
happy halloween, love dumplings! 
